Content warning for this season: blood (no bloody violence, but frequent discussion of blood)
This crew are genuine professionals. Well, maybe some of them are just lucky. What tricks do they all have up their sleeves? And will they be enough to pull a win out of this mess they're in?
With Ellie Pitkin, Chris Buxey, David Turnbull, and Josh Yard
Created and hosted by Matt (@MerelyMJ)
In association with Blackshaw Theatre Company (www.blackshawonline.com)
facebook.com/MerelyRoleplayers
Promo: The Space Jam Continuum (kaiju.fm/the-space-jam-continuum)
Episode transcript
Promo
Chris: We live in difficult times.
Cal: In this, the era of the cinematic universe, the TV of our childhood has begun to seem disjointed and nonsensical.
Chris: That's why we, The Space Jam Continuum podcast team, have taken it upon ourselves to fashion a coherent cinematic universe from something that was simply never meant to be one.
Cal: The Looney Tunes and Merrie Melodies franchise.
Chris: So join us for an epic tale of interdimensional travel…
Cal: Secret government agencies…
Chris: Monkey mayors…
Cal: Unsustainable welfare states…
Chris: Submissive dogs…
Cal: Escaped toons…
Chris: Regenerating pigs…
Cal: Questionable employment law…
Chris: Trouser hams…
Cal: Sentient eggs…
Chris: Malformed, puffy dough-trotters…
Cal: Demarcation…
Chris: And porcine family drama.
Cal: There's a long road ahead, so why not join us for the ride, every Wednesday on Kaiju FM, or wherever you like to listen to podcasts?
Chris: As we try to create one exhaustive, cohesive, Space Jam Continuum.
Tricks of the Trade (Let’s Get Gideon Backstage)
Matt: Let's find out all of your tricks of the trade.
Ellie: So tricky.
Matt: We know what you're generally good at, your general areas of strength and weakness, from your scores, but now we're going to work out exactly the talents, skills and special moves that you bring to this heist. You all get three slots in effect, which you can fill… you can fill those, either with a special move - a signature move, which only you can attempt. You can fill it with a talent which is a particular area of skill in which you get a bonus to any rolls that you do that relate to it. You can fill it with an element, which is a situational element where you are particularly strong. Or you can fill it with a gadget, which is an item that allows you to do things you wouldn't normally be able to do. Like a lockpick, that kind of stuff. So who's got a good idea of what they want their tricks of the trade to be?
Chris: Yeah I can go first.
Matt: Nice. What are you taking?
Chris: Okay well I’ll do an easy one first. I'll take one gadget...
Matt: Okay
Chris: ...to be decided on later.
Matt: Yes. So we can define gadgets right now if you want to decide exactly what it is, but you also have the option of just saying: “I have a gadget”, and then when it comes up in the game, when you decide you need one, you say: “this is what my gadget was”.
Chris: Okay I think I very much just have a gadget up to this point.
Matt: Good stuff.
Chris: And then I was thinking for a talent... “emergency upcycling”. So basically Macgyvering things... so if I need to repair a bit of machinery or equipment or repurpose something to meet our needs during the heist… I was thinking a plus one to that?
Matt: Yes very good.
Chris: With that roll, would that be Brains?
Matt: It depends on the situation. It's not always gonna be the same stat, I don't think. Whichever stat you're rolling against you'll get a plus one because it's your talent.
Chris: Great, okay.
Matt: It depends, if you're trying to do it quickly under pressure, without anybody noticing that you're meddling, that would be Cool.
Chris: Okay yeah.
Matt: If you're doing it in order to manipulate how people... you're trying to loop the security cameras or something, I feel like that would be more of a Wiles thing. So it's gonna be situational. But whichever way you'll get plus one.
Chris: Great okay. And then for my third option I was thinking of a signature move: “I'm here to help”. I'm honestly here to help... “I'm on your side”. So I was thinking where I'm trying to deceive people to think I'm actually on their side and if they've got a problem… “Oh I’m the person who just happens to be there to solve it…”
Matt: Yeah so this move triggers when you go into a room full of bad guys and claim that you're the fixer; that you’re there to sort the problems that they have? Maybe you're there to take down the people trying to grift them and they all believe you, if you succeed at the move.
Chris: Excellent yeah.
Josh: Around the table we go?
Ellie: Yeah sure. Okay I would like very much to have a signature move named “Quick spin in a phone box”.
Matt: Very nice and how does that work?
Ellie: So it means I have the ability to disguise myself at very short notice and with very little resource.
Matt: So basically any time that you need to blend in in some way, you need a uniform to blend in with a crowd of bad guys, or you need to suddenly be a visiting dignitary or something like short notice, you just have to roll Cool and on a success you whip together a quick disguise.
Ellie: Yeah, I feel like nine times out of ten it's just gonna be a high vis jacket! Because that gets you most places.
Josh: High vis jacket and a clipboard?
Ellie: Yeah.
Matt: The all purpose disguise. Very nice. You have that.
Ellie: Thank you and I would like two talents.
Matt: Okay, what are your talents?
Ellie: Well I couldn't choose between them so I thought I’d go for two: “Forgery” - so that could be forging anything, pretty much.
Matt: Yeah: IDs, signatures, deeds, anything you like.
Ellie: Yeah does it stretch to art forgery and all that stuff?
Matt: Absolutely.
Ellie: Yeah. And “Hacking” - because I like a tapperta-tapperta on the keyboard…
Matt: You’re going to be the one outside in the van…
Ellie: Sometimes... but now you can just hack on-the-fly, can’t you, with phones and iPads and things!
Matt: So a forging/hacking/disguise expert.
Ellie: I'm very multitalented.
Josh: Amazing!
Matt: Nice yeah. So you can just disguise yourself to get into the place where you need to do that.
Ellie: Yeah exactly.
Matt: Very good. Cool. Dave - what are you taking?
Dave: Well because we decided that I was so Cool, I thought I would take the ability to be the Fonz and if I come up against any kind of technologies I could just give it a little bash…
Matt: So the funny thing about that is it wouldn't be a roll against Cool...
Dave: No...
Matt: ...it would be a roll against Muscle.
Dave: No… but the Fonz is cool!
Matt: So if you do the thing the Fonz always does with the jukebox and just hit the technology and make it work…
Ellie: “If in doubt, give it a clout!”
Matt: Yeah! So if Ellie tries to hack something and doesn’t do very well you can just hit it instead!
Dave: Then give it a sideways thumbs…
Ellie: That would be so insulting… if I’ve spent three hours hacking something and you just smack it on the side…
Matt: It would be like - you’ve got the jar lid started…
Ellie: Yeah exactly.
Matt: Okay cool. So you can Fonz the technology.
Dave: My second idea doesn't really have a name yet… I've written “Lucky Break”... but the idea that, if something's going really badly, something just quite fortunate can happen and turn that around.
Matt: So basically we're going to define this as, if you're in a life-or-death situation or immediate danger of being arrested, captured or that kind of thing, you can roll this “Lucky Break” and see if suddenly you fall through a trapdoor or something…? I don't know.
Dave: Yeah or if I was falling down a lift shaft or something... suddenly I get stuck by my belt on the exact floor we were aiming for.
Matt: That kind of thing! So you can turn bad situations to your advantage?
Dave: Yeah. And the last one was just to have a gadget also undefined at the moment.
Matt: Cool so you're going to define that when you need it? Very nice. Last one - Josh?
Josh: Well Mr Gamesmaster - i would like to go for a gadget. And I have defined my gadget as a grappling gun…
Matt: Very nice.
Josh: ...a grappling gun to gain access to faraway places I can’t reach… to climb up the side of walls in an Adam West's Batman way…
Matt: I mean continuing the Batman theme…?
Josh: Continuing the Batman theme, I've gone for an ability that I've called “Smoke Bomb”. Which it's not a gadget itself… does not constitute a physical…
Matt: You don't actually have the thing?
Josh: ...I don't have a smoke bomb but if I yell “smoke bomb” I can hopefully create enough of a distraction from an individual that I'm talking to, to escape from a situation that I don't particularly want to be in. A social situation rather than a physical one.
Matt: Yeah, so I think we'll say this triggers where you want to escape from unwanted attention. So it doesn't necessarily have to be like a one-on-one social situation… it could be - you're in a crowd and you can see that the bad guy team is closing in on your position you can just slip away.
Josh: Absolutely. In my head I've got the Assassin's Creed thing of putting my hood up and just blending in with a passing group of pilgrims, you know? Or like you say - the great Batman gambit of just disappearing mid-conversation with somebody, when they turn their head for a split second.
Ellie: So rude!
Josh: Very rude. And my last one… did we work out if this was a skill?
Matt: It was a talent, I believe.
Josh: “Master of Puppets” I’ve called it… and that is just a straight ability increase to do with manipulation?
Matt: So it’s a plus one… whenever you're trying to manipulate somebody into doing what you want them to do, potentially against their own interests, you get a plus one to that roll whatever stat you're rolling against.
Josh: Excellent.
Matt: Okay so we have Wiley Batman. We have Lucky Jukebox Smasher. We have a forging, hacking, master of disguise. And Mr Charles from Inception meets Macgyver.
Dave: What a team!
Ellie: A heady mix!
Matt: I’m so excited to see what kind of grift you pull off.
Ellie: If we pull it off…!
Josh: We’re doing it for Loulou B’Goo.
Outro
Matt: You’ve been listening to Merely Roleplayers. You can look us up wherever you find podcasts, on Twitter @MerelyRoleplay and at Facebook.com/MerelyRoleplayers. Reviews and kind words are all very much appreciated and we hope you’ll join us again for our next episode.